Halu.
Remembered my entry on SUKA?
Well, here's the deal. Few days ago, I was in a dilemma or whether or not to chat up with him through FB. You know the saying, 'If you miss someone, tell them!'. Well, call me old-fashioned, but I am not really fond of the idea of a woman starting the conversation. But I was at the edge of despair, for I've been thinking lots about him and I kept on seeing his face everywhere that I go. So I thought, heck, might as well I go and say something. Just deviate a bit from my norm. Maybe it could change my life? So, I did.
Ended up well for the first conversation, though. However, I noticed something. I am turning into this gigglish, flirty girl which I never have done before. Anddd I am of a more dominance position in that conversation. Guys normally tried hard to get me, but this? Seriously? Why am Ibecoming the one who tried harder? And now I am regretting my actions.
I just can't 'connect' with this guy. Communication is the key to any relationship, and I have the feeling that we have a lonnnnggg way down that road. We are barely even reciprocating that talk. It is a one way conversation where I am asking all the questions. Yet, he seems to potray the idea of liking me back. He rarely talks to women so that's probably the reason why it is hard for both of us. I am going nuts over that problem and was hoping that he would loosen it up a bit. Either that or he was just not as interested in me. But what's up with the flirty chats? You are contradicting yourself and that's making me a very confused cat indeed.
If I know we can't communicate well, so why bother trying? I don't know! That's what making me ballistic. Maybe it's the cant-have-the-toy theory? Or curiousity is building up inside, wanting to know whether I can get to know more of the person hiding behind this cute, shy and quiet guy? I hope curiousity won't end up killing the cat.
And I am not sure if the fact that I am changing myself as a good or bad change. Am not even sure what I am initially.
Advice, anyone?
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